How Not to Name Your Business: Some of the Worst Business Names

How Not to Name Your Business: Some of the Worst Business Names

There is no question that choosing the right business name is one of the most critical phases of the business launch. Get it wrong and you might as well as have doomed your business’ prospects. Get it right and you could ride on the name beyond your wildest dreams. There are companies that get their naming right such as SnapChat and Facebook but others do fairly very badly. Here are some examples of bad business names:-

KeePass: The company providers an open source password management tool where passwords are stored in secure databases for both MS Windows and other operating systems. The idea is to “Keep Password” but it could also imply “Keep A**”.

Lawdingo: Lawdingo has been described as the “Uber for Lawyers”. It instantly connects clients and lawyers online for consultations and services. Lawdingo is loved because it is hyper-efficient and quite affordable. A 30-minute consultation will only cost the client $50. However, when you have a service that involves law, clients are looking for quality, credibility and professionalism. And the word “dingo” does not do justice to a service that wants to brand itself as of high quality and professional. A –dingo name is perhaps better preferred for a pet store or kids’ games.

dingorific

ChubbyBrain: No matter how many times you try to guess it, you will never figure it out. This is a name that is totally disconnected from the mission of the company. ChubbyBrain is actually a funding recommendation engine that carries out an analysis of the funding histories of some of the leading angel investors and venture capitalists or even grant providers who can be a good match for their businesses. By doing that, it will optimize your chances of getting successful funding for your business.

Dogpile: This is a search engine that is older than Google. Nowadays, it is simply a search aggregator although the name still conjures some really nasty images.

Bawte: The Des Moines-based in startup was founded in 2012 and gave users a means through which they can track down the items that they had purchased or BOUGHT and that is where the name came from. Instead of using the name “bought”, the company opted for a quirky “bawte” but it was still a branding #fail.

AnalTech: Here is a case of a word amalgamation in business naming gone awry. The company specializes in making thin-layer chromatography plates and the name comes from an amalgam of “analytics” and “technology”.

Xobni: The name “xobni” is derived from “Inbox” spelled backwards. However, spelling the name backwards completely disconnected it from the niche in which the company was operating before it was shut:- creating innovative email-based products. Besides, the name is not easy to pronounce; it is quite a mouthful and does not roll off the tongue.

Vowch: Vowch Commonwealth is an app used for social recommendations. It offers a creative way through you can search for something you like and also learn more about what others are doing. Seems it is a play on the word “vouch” though a half-hearted and non creative one.

Livr: Livr was described as a “social network for drunk people” and its motto was “drink till you livr” . It tells people to party till they drop dead presumably by damaging their liver. But the name, while terrible for a serious startup, was appropriate for a hoax app that was poking fun of the startup culture buzz and the readiness with which the tech community embrace the next “hot” startup idea without much vetting.

Grexit: In this case, events caught up with the name. While Grexit wasn’t necessarily a great name, events in Greece made the company attract lots of unwanted traffic and negative attention and that, eventually, had a negative impact on the company’s brand.

There are numerous other companies around the world that really got the name business upside down. These are just but a few. Don’t be like them. There are plenty of cool and brandable business names that will give you startup an edge in the market. If you don’t have the creative juices flowing, it is better to hire a branding expert to help you brainstorm the best business names and not something goofy and ridiculous. One place where you can find some really cool business names that will pass the radio test is nameperfection.com. Here you can find names chosen by branding experts which will pass the good brand name test:- very descriptive names, with some personality and which are also easy to say and discern. They should give out clues without being too obvious and make sure they are rolling off the tongues easily.